Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

Did it get cool enough at night that I could finally sleep with my bedroom door closed again?  Yep!

Except for the other night when it was warm enough that with my door closed I needed to strip down to just a sheet.

And was it cool enough at night that I could finally put my weighted blanket on over my summer weight duvet? Yup!

Except for the next night when it was too warm again and I had to push it all the way down to the very bottom of my bed. And then a few nights later (earlier this week) where it was warm enough that I was back to just a sheet and my bedroom door open again!

So yeah, we're in the middle of late summer very very early fall and while the weather has been lovely and temperate, it's still not quite stable enough to fully commit to night time changes. (But I know that's coming soon enough, so I'm trying to just enjoy what *is* right now.) 

 Oh, I also thought of a couple of other indicators.... my swimsuit no longer dries (hung up in the bathroom) before bedtime (when I'm in the pool before noon) and on Sunday I turned my bathroom radiator back on (low) in part because of this "lack" of dryness.  And I've been wearing my hoodie and socks in my comfy day clothes time (rather than my sarong when it's hotter.) 

I Think I Figured It Out

Over the last few years my mornings have been getting worse and worse.  

I would drag myself out of bed and just be in the worst mood.  Like not a grumpy mood, an absolutely awful, horrible, I don't want to exist in this world any more kind of mood.

It didn't matter all that much if it was a non work day, my mood would be frighteningly (really) bad even on days off or holidays.  

My mood would improve by mid day and that felt like such a relief but it was really concerning how awful I was feeling and thinking in the mornings.  I didn't know what to do about it.

Nothing I was trying was helping and I was starting to really worry about myself and if I could keep going spending hours each morning in this awful of a space.  

About half a year ago or so (I don't remember exactly and I don't feel like getting off my couch right now to check my date book) I went to a naturopath.  As part of that conversation about how to improve my health and well being, she suggested I increase my protein intake.  Something I have heard repeatedly from food expert type people over the years (dieticians, nutritionists, etc.)  So I looked into and found a Canadian made protein powder and started adding that into my days.

During this time of thinking through how to add more protein to my days, I started to think about how and when I eat in general.

Years ago someone recommended I do 'intermittent fasting' and so for years, I've been stopping eating at 7:30pm and not eating again until the morning, and sometimes the mid morning.

Well I thought more and more about this.  

Most days I have my dinner around 6pm, give or take.  And then at 7:30, I take my night time medications with a piece of bread or cracker or something (I can't swallow pills without food.)  But at that 7:30pm time I wasn't ever having anything of substance, which meant my last meal and my last protein intake would have been in the late afternoon.  I was eating dinner on the early side and then not having any more protein til like mid day at the earliest? Hang on a second..... was my attempts to "intermittently fast" actually crashing me out emotionally and making me literally want to die?  Hmmm... this is an experiment that was worth testing.

So I started making sure that when I had my last "food" of the day, it had protein in it.  So if I was having a slice of bread to take my pills with, I'd also have something that gave me a good chunk of protein (this is where the greek yogurt came in, it was perfect for this, if not perfect for my stomach....)

And you guys?  Within not that long of a time, mornings started not sucking.  I'm not kidding.

My mornings now are fine.  Sometimes I'm tired of course, or maybe I'm grumpy about having to go to work or do something but I'm no longer in that scary state where I just wanted to not *be*.

I have no doubt that adding protein to my evening has saved my sanity if not my life.  I was not going to make it through with mornings being that low.  I don't have the science or medicine knowledge to know if it was blood sugar dropping or if I was starving myself or what was technically going on, I'm just incredibly grateful that I thought things through and not only increased the overall amount of protein I'm having every day but specifically giving my body protein in the evening to last my system (and apparently my mind!) overnight and into the mornings.

I can not over emphasize enough what a difference this has made for my well being.  

So maybe just keep in mind that health trends and suggestions that may be working well for a whole lot of people may not work for your body and system, or you might be interpreting it slightly incorrectly or missing an aspect of it you can adjust.

I am so grateful that I figured this out, gave it a try, and feel so so so so SO much better.  

So grateful. 

Well, That's Not Ideal*

I was cleaning my bathroom this weekend and had a roll of paper towels on the sink counter space and the sink water running to wash something or other out and when I turned to do whatever, I accidentally knocked over the paper towel roll into the sink.... where the water was running.

You can see where I'm going with this....

That paper towel roll very loyally soaked up the running tap water for the second or two it was in the path and that's why I now have a soggy roll of paper towel in my freezer! 

 

 

*Is literally what I said, which is way easier on my system than freaking out and getting stressed.  

Burnt Toast

Somehow, a lot of us grew up with having learned that if you smell burnt toast you are having a stroke (or something else bad is happening to your brain.)

I just did a google search about it and it seems it might have been a "Heritage Moment" video but alls I know is smelling burnt toast (when there's no burnt toast) isn't a good thing.

So last night I was watching something when I very distinctly smelt burnt toast.

Hmmm, I thought to myself, I did make toast earlier, but it was a couple of hours ago so it's unlikely from that.  A small tiny part of my brain thought maybe I should get up and look at the toaster just to make sure but that seemed a little unreasonable.  But the smell was still pretty intense.

There weren't any smoke detectors going off, which I think they really only would if you REALLY REALLY burnt the toast (burnt toast doesn't give off a lot of smoke until things go seriously wrong) so I had no external evidence of it being a neighbour and I really didn't want to text someone saying "I might be having a stroke" at like 9pm at night, so instead, I stuck my head into my hoodie.  Or, I suppose, I pulled my hoodie collar up to cover my nose, more accurately.

And, thankfully, the smell went away.  So it wasn't my brain doing weird brain things it was someone in an apartment near me who literally burnt their toast.  

I did also hold both my arms up and try to say a sentence out loud but I'm not sure you can self-check for stroke symptoms but anyway, I'm glad I was able to make the smell "go away" and it wasn't some health scare, just a bad toaster situation for someone nearby!

Um, Yeah, No.

So I got an email from Pinterest the other day saying that one of my pins had broken their legal policy but that after review they reinstated it and if I had any further issues like this legal would get involved.

The problem with this though is that I don't HAVE a Pinterest account.  

The email was legit and sent to my proper email account and a small tiny little part of me thought that maybe? I had made a pinterest account a long long time ago and forgotten about it so I went to log in.

Of course I get to the sign in page and choose "forgot password" and so the change password thing comes to my email and I change the password and log in and yeah that's not me.  I go to the profile and it's very much not me but it has *my* email in there.  (It was just maybe a meme or two and  three selfies of a teen looking person and from who knows when - I didn't look too carefully into thing,s but it wasn't a particularly full or in use profile IMO.)

So, I deleted the entire account.  Not sorry about it either because I have no idea how someone created this account with MY email or if I did used to have an account ages ago and someone took it over, but either way, yeah no.  Not happening.

So I deleted and confirmed the deletion and then sent a ticket to their help system saying that someone had used my email and there is no account tied to that email and that I had deleted the account.  Not sure if I'll hear back from them but yeah that was a weird thing.

 

Ooops, I Did It Again

You know that sometimes I think too much about something and then get really weirded out and in my head about it....

Well, this time I did it with my bellybutton.

I have, as many of us (ladies over a certain age) have put on some weight.  Especially, for the first time ever, around my belly (not a great place for it, health wise, as I understand it, but I'm trying... I really really am.)

So my belly is larger than it ever ever has been which means, I discovered, that my bellybutton is deeper than it ever has been.  Which I discovered when I was cleaning it the other day and then I started thinking too much about it and how it "grew" with the belly sticking out and all of that just made me feel really weird and uncomfortable so of course I wrote myself a note to come and tell you about it!  

But yeah.  Don't contemplate your belly button for too long.  You might end up as weirded out as I did. 

What A Treat

I'm reading a book by Andy Weir (the fellow who wrote the Martian, that was turned into a movie, I really enjoyed both) right now.

It's another of his books that has been adapted into a movie (that is soon-ish to come out) and that I wanted to read before the movie came out and that I "treated" myself to (I really do try to use the library rather than spending money on books but sometimes all the books I want are on long waiting lists and I don't like the pressure of someone else waiting for me to finish QUICKLY so I'll let myself buy a book here and there).

I am enjoying it.  (Some of the science is a lot for my mushy-these-days brain but still....) And what that means for me is that I really look forward to going to bed.  (That's where I do my reading.)

Having a book that I look forward to reading is such a treat and makes the idea of going to bed a real pleasure.

So thank you to the authors who write the books that make me excited to read.  It's such a wonderful feeling to have and I love that I love to read.  (Thanks to my parents for that, and to local libraries!) 

Another Spider Story

(Sorry Y, I know you no likey them!)

I was having a shower recently and out of the corner of my eye I saw movement on the bathroom ceiling (not IN the shower but nearby.)

Paying closer attention I saw a spider starting to make its way towards the shower.  So, I did what seemed logical and said, out loud "no, don't do that, don't come closer!" and, lo and behold, the spider stopped and went the other way.

I like to think the spider understood me, and maybe there was some sort of weird "energy" reason that it did or something but in my head I totally talked to the spider and it listened!  (Even though it was likely just co-incidence)

 

Dude!

I think you know that I don't kill spiders (except for a few that I think I may have squished or drowned by total accident and I still feel really badly about that) and you may also know that this is one of a few times of year that you start to see them more.  (I forget why, but it's a thing... temperatures or moisture or something?)

Usually in my place I have the "daddy long leg ones" that are kind of hard to notice and are small in body but LooooooOOOoooong in legs and they seem to be the ones that make the messy webs and I seem to see them year round.

Well, the last week or so I have seen a couple of little small dark spiders.  

Including yesterday morning when I woke up, rolled over to get out of bed and saw one on my wall next to my bed.

"DUDE!" I said.  Yes, out loud.  The rule being no one in my bedroom (that I can see) and not near me kind of at all ever (sorry) and not near my food eating devices thanks.  And I got out of bed, grabbed a dirty glass from the dishwasher and escorted the fellow/lady out into the hallway.  

But like yeah.  No THANK YOU in my bedroom first thing in the morning.  NUH UH. 

Maybe?

I think it maybe really finally feels like fall is approaching.

We've had a light layer of wildfire smoke this last week or so (but still, we're doing pretty well comparatively speaking) but the times that a breeze has come, it has had a hint of a bite to it.

I think it was Friday night (maybe?) when I was in bed reading and I heard a chorus of distant "oooooohs" that I wondered about (my windows were covered by a sarong to try to filter out some of the smoke) and a moment later there was a rumble of thunder.

This isn't really an indication of autumn, more that things are unsettled *up there*.

C-Dawg wondered about bringing out some fuzzy pjs (to which I replied I wasn't ready to commit to warming up my bed quite yet!) and I think I've not fallen asleep with *just* a sheet for more than a week now.  So we're getting there.

I know summer lasts for another few weeks and I know that September here often has warm stretches but I can just feel the first licks of fall starting to arrive.  Is this the easiest go of a summer I've had in a while?  (Temperature wise?) Yeah, I'd say so, and I'm very grateful for that.   Very.  It made a world of difference for me not losing weeks at a time to the heat.  

It's still been very dry and we still have wildfires we'd like to see rained on, but it feels like we're getting closer.  Hopefully.  I think.  

THUD THUD THUD

Someone moved in to the apartment above mine (after someone else moved out of course!) and they are a very very heavy walker.  Like.... very.

If you've never encountered a heavy walker before it's not something that they are necessarily aware of but if you live underneath (or sometimes near) one you know.  

Because of the age and build of this building we hear everything, well not everything, but sound really travels, and more than that, sound, if loud enough, will rattle or shake the building.

And unfortunately, the person who moved in above me walks heavily enough to, without exaggeration, shake my apartment.

The first night they moved in, I wasn't able to fall asleep until they either left the bedroom, or, I assume, got into their own bed.  Their steps shook my bed.  Seriously.  So it's not just the THUD THUD of the feet/heels, it's also a reverberation that shakes things.  It's not really ignore-able.

I'm giving them some time to settle in, and maybe put down some rugs and/or put things up and around that will help baffle the sounds of their phone conversations and phone buzzing and whatever else, but I think I will have to do/say something about it and that is freaking me the hell out.  

So the combo of the noise and shaking/shuddering and knowing that I will have to "confront" (even if polite and well thought out it still feels like a confrontation to me, which I genuinely am not comfortable with) them to ask if they can walk more lightly (which I don't even know if that's a thing people can do?!) is freaking me out and it's been a stressful few days.  Like, big time stressful for me.  

I've typed out a few versions of a note I might leave at their door and I partially hope maybe I run into them naturally in the hallway or something but I know I'll babble because man oh man do I ever feel bad that I'm asking someone to put me first.  Is that logical?  Nope, but it's still how I'm feeling.  But this isn't just the normal "someone walking around" that you get used to in an older apartment, this is a lot.  

But again, I'm trying to cope for the first few days or week to see if things will settle once the "move in" period has passed but omg y'all this has not been an ok few days.

Jason has said he would knock on the door but I think that's too much for me all things considered.)  A few years back a new tenant below me used their portable speaker on their outside balcony (bottom floor has a couple, the rest of us don't) and it shook my walls.  I asked my manager to talk to the person and I guess when they did they said the complaint was from me because I got a knock on my door and that woman confronted me about it being impossible she had shaken my walls.  (This was also during lockdown so getting a knock on the door was uncomfortable to begin with.)  And it's not like it's loud music which could be handled, as I've seen happen before, by a note on all doors saying "we've had complaints, remember noise travels" or something like that... this is one person who is very heavy footed and so it feels really scary for me to deal with.  But the noise and shaking is also driving me nuts, especially when I'm trying to sleep... so... we'll see how this goes, and I hope it goes well and if I do end up asking them to.... uh... walk a little differently?  I hope that goes ok and they understand and just omg this is pushing so many buttons for me.  But also I've lived here quite a long time and a heavy walker is a first for me... as far as I can remember....I've dealt with other noise things but not this.  This is something I'm not sure can be easily fixed like putting on earphones for your music or turning your tv down or something.  This is a human's anatomy and habits.  You know?

I Know This Is Obvious But

I am both super excited and feeling dumb because at work today I moved, with my hand, a spiderweb that was in a corner (I don't really know why don't ask!) , like one of those messy ones not the web pretty ones and the damn thing stuck to me!  

So I was at the same time going THAT'S SO COOL IT'S ACTUALLY STICKY WOW I HAD NO IDEA! and also "omg of course it's sticky now I feel dumb" but yeah, spider webs are SUPER STICKY!!!!! It's so cool!!!! (duh)

(To be fair to myself, I have never moved one with my hands before other than swatting away a single strand in the woods or something, so this was a new experience for me!) 

Sooooooo......

I have a family dinner tonight to see visiting relatives I have only ever seen a handful of time in my life.

And?  We have no hot water in my building.

Double and?  I didn't wash my hair yesterday because I was going to wash it today.  

Today is a Sunday.  I noticed the lack of hot water when I was going to bed last night.  No idea who to call as we're only supposed to call on weekends if it's a life threatening emergency and technically this kind of isn't?  But also I'd like to have hot water?

I mean either I'll wash my hair in a cold shower or I'll put it up and hope for the best. 

 

Edited to update 1pm:   I called the service people on call line (even though it really didn't feel like an emergency) and they came out and now we have hot water again YAY!  Hair washed, phew.  

Ow!

I have dealt with and been dealing with various stomach upsets for decades now.  I am usually pretty good at knowing what set off or triggered a stomach issue, and I'm usually able to match a symptom to a food.

Like, too much gluten for too many days in a row?  That's a sharp stabbing pain right *there* (points to the location).  Certain candies?  A combo of pain and reflux felt in the esophagus more than the stomach. Etc. etc.  I've gotten pretty good at knowing what did it (garlic, onion, etc.) and how to help it settle down a bit more.  (Weirdly, no idea why, but often sugar will settle my stomach.  Go figure.  7Up is a go-to for upsets.)

Which is why I'm quite confused by whatever has been going on with my stomach for the last few days.... 

It started almost a week ago now with me having some DELICIOUS in season local fruit (as I have done for weeks and weeks now... quite happily) with my mid morning meal and then getting nauseated.  That was weird.  I thought about what I'd eaten and none of them were trigger foods so maybe it was just a random nausea?  (Nausea is my least fave, but usually I have stuff I can take to shut it down pretty quick.)

The next day I had different fruit and the same thing happened.  Nausea right after.  What on EARTH was going on?

I wondered if maybe the fruit had some kind of issue (bacteria or spoilage or something?) but with it being cherries and then blueberries that didn't seem likely (plus I wash things, not that that's perfect but still.)  Hmm.... I started to get suspicious that something bigger than "bad fruit" was going on.

I know I've been having a LOT of dairy lately.  In my efforts to up my protein, I've been having either greek yogurt or Skyr every night (they're both pretty decent in protein) and because I'm not good with dairy anymore I've been taking lactaid and it's been fine.

But I wondered if maybe it hasn't actually been fine and I have irritated my stomach and the fruit just happened to set it off.  Maybe I had too many days of dairy in a row rather than having something else some nights.  So I cut that out of my diet for that night.

I also got rid of what was left of the fruit as it was still setting off nausea, and that was a real bummer, but just in case it was the cause somehow.

I can't remember how many nights in it was, but I hadn't had dairy for probably three or four days at this point, and at about 3am that night I was woken up by a very painful stomach.

Pain in a way I did not recognize.  As I said above, I'm usually able to pinpoint what kind of stomach pain it is and know how to deal with it.  This wasn't a recognizable pain to me.   I wasn't able to sleep or lie on my side, I could only be on my back for it to be bearable so I got out of bed and went to the bathroom.  That was, to be polite, uneventful so it's not like it was gas pain or needing to go to the bathroom or anything and my stomach felt rock hard.  Maybe a little sticky out, and hard to the touch.  It was weird and not something I'm used to.

I started to wonder about food poisoning but I didn't have any other digestive symptoms, just the pain.

I went back to bed and still wasn't able to be in a side position so I just lay on my back and hoped I would fall asleep which I eventually did, but it wasn't a great night due to that whole "woken up by pain" thing.

I tried to take it easy on what I ate the next day and I was in a weird limbo of kind of being hungry but also being afraid of eating in case it caused pain or nausea or something.

I think it was yesterday when I woke up thinking "ok, I think my stomach is better now" and I figure that is about five days.  I'm still avoiding dairy... am kind of scared of it to be honest.  

I have no actual idea of what went on (or is still going on but just mildly?)  Did I have mild food poisoning?  Have I had too much dairy for too long?  Did I catch a flu bug of some sort?  I really don't know.  I just know that my stomach was getting nauseated from fruit (which has never been an issue for me before) and then I had a nasty middle of the night stomach pain and I don't know what happened or how to stop it from happening again.  And I'm worried about how to get my protein at night now if I'm not ok to take the yogurts.  (Protein at night is helping my mental state, I've just not gotten around to writing about it yet but trust me I need that protein at night... and not something "heavy"... and no, I'm not great with beans... sigh)

So yeah.  My stomach was painful enough to wake me up and I don't know why that happened.  (And yes I have had a little bit of fruit as of yesterday and I wasn't nauseated so thankfully I didn't suddenly become allergic to fruit.) 

It's Still August And Summer

We had a few hot days (not stupid hot just uncomfortable hot) and at first they said it would last all week and then the apps started to disagree with each other and now it looks like maybe rain (probably not?) and some cooler temps (but not actually cool/cold) and then we'll hit September and it, as far as I can think on a rather tired brain, is usually warm too.

So... still dealing with heat, which means dealing with the noise of the cooling devices (that I am very grateful for) so my nerves aren't as chill as I'd like them to be.   

Philosophical Musing

I've been thinking for a few weeks now about what, technically, is happening in bed in the morning before I get up.

As I understand it we 'wake' several times a night to varying degrees going in and out of sleep cycles and such.  

So when I am in the "early morning" type range, say 5am or so and I notice it's maybe kind of light out and I know it's not yet time to get up and I go back to sleep, am I napping?

Like am I napping when I "sleep in" in the morning or am I still sleeping because I've now lain in bed a few times wondering about that.

I mean a few mornings ago I got up at 7am and went pee and then went back to bed and that seems like a nap but also seems like I went back to sleep.

Is a nap defined by its length?  It's timing?  Location?  Time of day?  

I'm sure there are no defined answers to this but until my brain decides to stop wondering about it, it's on my mind.  Am I napping in bed most mornings or am I continuing to sleep? 

ERMAGHERDDDDD!!!!

So you know how from time to time over the years I have found (and documented) random banana peels I've found all around?  And we've always wondered where they came from and why and how?

Well?  I may have found the source!  It still leave a lot of questions to be fair, but look at this!!!!

BANANAS!!!!!!  STILL IN THE PEEL!!!!  Just... SCATTERED THERE FOR NO REASON!!!!

This is a real breakthrough.

Not an answer.  But... something.

(I'm not sure what!) 

 

Uh....

I think I just like put out a rib or something from napping?

Sigh.  Why do bodies gotta be so... picky?

Also, I'm pretty sure it's because I kept resetting my alarm (I set one when I nap so I don't nap too long) and then not moving and so I stayed on my one side for too long rather than the normal moving and shifting you do when you actually sleep (or actually nap for an hour straight.) 

Transformers! (More Than Meets The Eye!)

So I got to see what it looks like when an electrical transformer blows up!

Or... I got to see the aftermath of something *like* that, I'm not entirely sure.

I had just gotten into bed and was settling down to read my book which means I face the windows.  My blinds are half up, as always, to let whatever air might be cool in and I hear a BIG explosion and see "lighting" and although it was raining this wasn't *right* for lightning and thunder.

The explosion was VERY loud and not thunder-y and the flash was similar to lightning but not quite the right colour (that I'm used to... it was more blue maybe?) but I still wasn't sure what was going on so I got out of bed and checked online and sure enough a local site had a "what was that!?" post and people thought it was maybe a transformer blowing and people mentioned a power outage semi-nearby.

Now I'd figured if I was close enough to see and hear a transformer blowing up my power would go off, but it didn't and it wasn't until the next morning, seeing the hydro company's website saying "tree across our lines" that I got to find out where it was (a few streets over) and because I don't understand electrical grids or lines I have no idea how localized the outage was but a few days later I did go for a discovery walk and found that one of the lovely old old trees that this part of town has fell over, thankfully missing any structures (or people or anything) but yeah.  I won't say "seeing a transformer explode" was on a bucket list or anything and I'm not 100% sure a transformer did blow up or what exactly the flash was but I feel like I can say I saw enough of what it does look like that I can check that off of my "things I've seen" list!

Glad it went as well as it did with no injuries and no fire and no wide spread power outage, yay. 

I Have No Idea Anymore

So you might remember that a while ago (like more than a month ago) I got bitten up by something (and I was really worried it was bed bugs).

Well, I'm here to tell you that the bites specifically on my arm STILL ITCH.

Not all the time, but still.  This is unfair!  It's been at least six weeks and I wake up almost every morning and they itch.  I put stuff on them and have no idea if it makes a difference or if I've just gotten used to the itching or what.

A few weeks after the bites though a friend at the water fitness class said she got bitten up by midges and she showed me the bites and the ones on her arm were the exact same pattern as the ones on my arm so maybe there is something *at* the gym (locker rooms?) or maybe in the air by the gym or maybe that's just another really weird coincidence but it did make me feel better that there are likely not bugs in my apartment.  (I hope)

But yeah, I don't know that I've had bites itch this long, and I don't know if it's whatever bit me or the heat or my age or what but I do know I do not like and I would like to not do it again and I would love to find something topical I can put on them that actually helps for more than three minutes! (I've tried all the over the counter things and... nothing does much to make a dent when the itching is really bad.)